Ten months and a Pet Scan....

It's crazy to think that we are almost at the year mark since Arley's diagnosis. Every month that passes it amazes me the amount of strength and resilience that she possesses. She has come so far into this journey and I'm hoping that we are soon finding a light at the end of this tunnel.

Tomorrow she goes in for a PET scan. I have kept this quiet until now because the next two months are going to be very crucial for us. In case you are unfamiliar with what a pet scan is, it basically means that its an imaging system that uses a radioactive substance called a "tracer" to look for disease in the body. It will also show how her organs and the tissue in her body are doing as well.

Coming to the decision to have a PET scan wasn't made very lightly. I hate the fact that I have to expose her to more radiation treatment absolutely HATE it. I wish it wasn't necessary to do believe me. Her little body doesn't need any extra crap flowing through it let me tell ya, but unfortunately this course of action is needed to determine whether all the toxins she has been exposed to have been working in her favor and killing off all the cancer cells and not forming any new ones. 

Remember, we still don't know what the growth forming in her face is and the MRI will not pick up on it either. The only positive to this is that thankfully nothing has shown up on the exterior of her face to cause an immediate worry like it did back in April with the mass bulging out of her neck.

I still try to remain very hopeful that something is working in her favor, but until I hear of the results I take everything with a grain of salt because there's the 50/50 that all could come back clear or come back that she has developed a new cancer. While obviously I want it to be clear, I also don't want to be crushed with bad news either.

Arley is also scheduled to have another MRI next month plus she is scheduled for surgery. Both of which should still happen regardless of the outcome from the PET scan. So as you can see March is going to be a very make or break month for the both of us. I'm hoping upon hope that with Spring slowly approaching that it will mean great things for us. After Winter and things dying off a newness approaches and blossoms before our eyes into a magnificent beauty and that's my wish for the upcoming month. That all the toxins will release themselves from Arley's body and that we can move on and try to have a more normal life...

One more carefree and without so much worry. One where she can go out and play and I don't have to be so overly concerned with what she may catch from people she interacts with. Where hopefully she can start preschool and be the typical 3.5 year old that she is. A normal life where perhaps I can finally breathe and stop holding my breath with every passing day and maybe perhaps release all this heavy weight that has been holding me down both literally and figuratively. Be able to feel less stress than I do these days. It's getting better for sure slowly, but it's all still there at the end of the day.

I have also been thinking long and hard about taking a little road trip with Arley, not sure if I mentioned it previously when thinking up a little bucket list full of adventure, but I really think that it would be beneficial for us to do because the winter has been so depressing with all the mountains of snow we have accumulated over the past month and a half. Be able to actually go out and smell the roses too!

Anyway, that's about it for right now. I will have lots of updates coming over the next several weeks so you will be reading a lot more about what's happening in our lives which I guess is pretty exciting since the winter has proved to have nothing spectacular to share.

Until next time friends.......

No I don't wanna build a snowman....

I realize it has been quite some time since I have updated anything having to do with Arley. There really hasn't been anything new to report as far as her treatment goes, we have just been buried under massive amounts of snow for the last several weeks.

Cabin fever has certainly been effecting us as I don't drive when it's snowy or icy out (why would we anyway?) and we have pretty much exhausted everything there is to do around here as well.

I'm anticipating Spring and will welcome it happily with open arms. I long to bring Arley to our favorite Daffodil garden and take our annual photos in the same spot. It's fun to watch how she has grown over the last couple of years that we have done it. (This will be our third) I am also hoping to jump start our play date group again and get her socializing with kids her own age because lord knows we need it. I miss spending the time with the other moms I have become friends with over the last two years and I know Arley misses her friends a lot too. It's been so hard especially in the winter months when her immune system is at it's lowest due to treatments to be able to attend anything.

I also really want to take her swimming and to the zoo. Try to have some normalcy as the warmer months approach. If you don't remember too much of our story as we approach 10 months in allow me to remind you... for the last two consecutive summers Arley has been really sick (supposedly with unrelated illnesses, but that's a debate for another time) and we have been home bound pretty much the entire summer with the occasional outing here and there, but very few and far between and I really want to make this summer a good one for her and let her do typical things a 3 year old should.

I've started to compile a bucket list of events in my head and may even post it here for all of you to follow along with us so that as we do them we can get satisfaction knowing that we crossed something fun off of our list and you can be there to experience it with us from the comfort of your own home. You all have been with us on this ride for such a long time that it only seems right to share this with you too.

Next up in Arley's treatment will be scheduling her for Physical Therapy, visiting the ENT doctor, scheduling her PET scan and finding out what this cancer business has in store for her and hopefully determining whether the growth in her face is something to worry about or breathe a sigh of relief over. I always try to remain optimistic as these scans and tests approach, but also keep the realistic expectation that it could come out with some not so happy news. I never want to get my hopes up only to be devastated later ya know? So with that, Arley and I will continue to keep on trucking on this journey and focus on all of the fun we plan to have once the weather warms up. Until then....